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  33

  Calculated Risk

  “Great, I’ve got you booked for Wednesday. Glad you liked the social promos. Yeah, use them anytime you want. Need anything else, you let me know. Otherwise see you next week.”

  I stretched out my legs on the old desk in front of me that was already a mess of flyers, promotions, and posters. It helped to take the weight off my quilted Valentino pumps for a few minutes.

  My office might’ve been a broom closet, but it was mine.

  The only light came from a tiny window the size of a shoebox, but Trevor was on the corner of my desk. And he was green.

  The job was harder than I’d expected. I took work home every day, and rarely did an hour pass when I wasn’t clueless about something. But I had a super power. I could figure shit out. And I could do it with a sense of humor.

  It was scary because if I didn’t figure it out, it mattered. It mattered to the talent. To Jack, who’d started this place from scratch.

  It felt good. I was living.

  But what I couldn’t say to Payton, Riley, and Rose on ladies’ night—what I wouldn’t admit to anyone—was that my heart still hurt when I went to bed alone. Woke up that way.

  I shifted out of my chair, adjusting the waist on my tight jeans with ripped knees before opening the door to the sound of laughter and supportive cheers.

  Open mic Mondays were the most popular on LIVE’s schedule, although I was planning to bring in bands Wednesday nights to break up the week.

  I grabbed a twelve-pack of beer from the back and hauled it toward the front. “You might be the best hire I’ve ever made.” Jack grinned his thanks as I dropped the case behind the bar.

  “I’m the only hire you’ve ever made,” I shot back, scanning the room. The crowd was thick, people here to shake off a Monday or convince their friends to try out new material.

  Payton, Max, and Riley occupied a table by the bar. I grabbed two bottles of beer and filled one glass with soda, depositing them on the table. “Friends. You came.”

  Payton squealed and hugged me. “Of course! We needed to see your new workplace. I have to say, it’s way cooler than the old one.”

  “I told her she shouldn’t be in a bar,” Max griped.

  “Laughter’s good for fetal development,” Riley interrupted smoothly, reaching for his beer.

  “Pull up a chair,” Payton called. I did. “So, Avery was looking pretty chummy with someone today at the office. A girl. She was pretty. Younger.”

  My head snapped up.

  “He introduced her as his sister.”

  I sighed out a breath. “Kenna was at the office?”

  “I didn’t even know he had a sister.” Payton cocked her head. “You were jealous,” she accused, the corner of her mouth twitching.

  “I’m not jealous,” I grumbled. “I want him to be happy.”

  “Happy alone.”

  Riley raised a brow. “So you still have feelings for this guy.”

  They stared at me.

  “Yes. OK? Yes I still have feelings for him.”

  “So why aren’t you getting him back?” Riley quipped.

  I shifted out of my chair. “Who says I’m not?”

  Riley grinned. Max shook his head. Payton gasped. “Charlie, what are you planning?”

  “Nope. My break’s over, back to work. I’ll catch you guys in a bit.”

  Payton groaned and Riley booed as I shoved out of my seat without giving them anything.

  “Another newbie,” Jack commented as I brushed past him. I glanced toward the front as the first guy came off the stage and another replaced him.

  The crowd gave the newcomer a round of cheers. Someone from the back shouted “Nice suit!” over the hearty applause as the guy settled in front of the microphone.

  I had to grab the edge of the bar for support. In my peripheral vision I saw Payton’s head whip around.

  Fuck. I said it in my head because I couldn’t form words.

  The man at the mic didn’t have the same problem. He cleared his throat and wrapped his hand around the stand.

  “Someone told me once that I have zero sense of humor.”

  “What’s that guy doing?” Riley mused.

  I folded my arms over my chest. “I have no idea.”

  “Thing is, I didn’t see it. I thought I had everything I needed. The job I’d always wanted. People who listened to me. But life has a way of kicking you in the balls when you think you have it all figured out.

  “See, one day, in walked this girl.”

  He paused, and someone in the audience tittered nervously.

  “I thought she worked for me, but she didn’t act like it. She stalked into my life on these damned heels and carried off my heart. I didn’t notice because she was so busy tearing strips off my ego. I mean, the woman shrank my shorts, for God’s sake.”

  Someone laughed.

  “What kind of woman does that?” Avery muttered, as if to himself. “But maybe I’m the problem, because I fell for her. Before this woman, I didn’t give a shit who I walked on to get what I wanted. But she changed that. Made me believe in things I never thought I’d believe in.”

  The crowd watched, waited.

  Avery shoved a hand through his hair, and my chest ached.

  “And then…she left. She left, and all of a sudden everything I used to think was fine wasn’t fine. It’s still not. Which is why I’m here.” He lifted his chin, looking unseeing into the spotlights. “Charlotte? I hope to hell you’re working tonight, because otherwise this is going to be fucking awkward.”

  “Charlie!” Payton hissed, slapping my ass.

  I blinked, stumbling forward through the tables in a haze. Every set of eyes in the room went to me. But I only cared about one.

  The recognition on his face when I appeared at the bottom of the stage had my heart stopping. I took the stairs up the side of the stage and stood before him while people started to murmur to each other in confusion.

  “You were supposed to wait. Kenna and I were working on a plan.”

  “My own sister betrayed me? When did she find the time?”

  “I’ve been auditing her women’s studies class.”

  “Louder!” someone hollered.

  “Can we get off this stage?” he murmured.

  “Yes please.”

  I tugged him after me backstage while someone else took over the mic. The curtains blocked us from the lights and the laughter.

  “How did you pull this off?”

  “Payton and Mia might have helped.” I swore to kill them. Or thank them, depending on how this ended up.

  “How are you?” he murmured. “They treating you OK here?”

  “It’s hard work. But my boss is easy.”

  The emotion in his face had my insides tingling. “I miss you every fucking day. Every part of you. Your smile, your clever brain, your smartass remarks.”

  “Really?”

  He shook his head. “I’m used to keeping things private, but the last two weeks I’ve been ready to hire a damned skywriter to tell the world you’re mine. I almost did it on the whiteboard in Jefferson the other day,” he added, a look of need in his eyes.

  The laugh that bubbled up was giddy.

  I took a deep breath. “You were right about something. I’ve been trying so hard to survive, I haven’t let myself live. I’m letting go of the past. In fact, I’m going to Jimmy’s wedding in a couple weeks.” I cocked my head. “Do you have any interest in a weekend trip to Canandaigua?”

  “How did you know it was on my list of top places to visit?” he deadpanned. The serious face dissolved into a grin, and I couldn’t resist running my hand up his strong chest, looping my arms around his neck.

  “You got funny while we were apart.”

  “I got miserable while we were apart,” he murmured against my neck.

  My chest ached, but this time it was in a good way. “Me too.”

  “I’m fucking glad. I don’t want to be
without you, Charlotte. It’s never been just sex. It was always you. You’re the only person in the world who could change my mind. Make me want what I never thought I’d have.”

  “What’s that?”

  “Trust. Caring. Love.”

  My eyebrows shot up. “Love?”

  His body was pressed against mine, and suddenly his words were competing with a thousand other sensations for my attention.

  But he nodded. “I tried to give you space, but that’s not my style.”

  “It’s really not,” I murmured. “So now you’re here.”

  “I am. And I love you.”

  “Well, shit. You really just said that.”

  “Calculated risk.”

  “You’re crazy, you know it?”

  “I was hoping for a more positive reaction,” he admitted.

  I pulled his mouth down to mine and kissed him with all the swirling emotions I was feeling.

  I pulled back first, even though it was the last thing I wanted. “I love you too. You really think we can do this? Because I can’t lose you again.”

  “We’ll figure it out. Because I’m red and you’re yellow.”

  “I thought I was red and you were yellow.”

  “I sense a compromise in the making.”

  “How mature of you.”

  “Mhmm. Let’s work it out naked.”

  “Only if you start in your Waldo costume.”

  I shoved at him, but he pulled me closer. He bent to kiss me. I let him for a moment, then pulled back as his hands snuck under the waistband of my pants. “Hey, watch the hands.”

  Avery glanced over my shoulder. “Where’s your desk?”

  “What, you think getting it on at work events is our thing now? I’ll have you know this is my new job and I happen to take it very seriously.”

  “Then let’s get the fuck out of here fast, because I’m going to take you very seriously.”

  His mouth found my neck and I gasped. “I was wrong. You’re still not funny.”

  Epilogue

  Avery

  3 months later

  “That’s it. This isn’t fucking working. It’s over,” I hollered through the wall.

  “Avery, come on.” Charlotte’s pleading voice came through the other side. “You said you love me. Can’t we try one more time?”

  I shifted back, studying the wooden shelves on the wall. “There’s a reason this rack broke in the first place. Too many damned shoes. You’re not going to fit another pair on this,” I muttered to myself.

  She stuck her blond head in the door of her bedroom, holding her hand over the speaker of her cell phone. “What?”

  Every time I saw her it was a punch in the gut. It was a feat of superhuman strength not to go weak at the knees at the sight of those eyes full of mischief. The full mouth that did a million things that kept me up at night. The body that fit mine to perfection.

  “I don’t care what closet Max Donovan’s built Payton for all her crap,” I muttered. “She’s pregnant, and he’s wrapped around her finger.”

  “Payton, I’ll call you back later all right?” my girlfriend said into her phone, then hit a button to disconnect.

  Charlotte sent me a teasing smile.

  “You, unlike Max, do exactly what you want.”

  “You know it.”

  “Have I ever told you how much I like a man who works with his hands?” Her voice went straight to my dick.

  “Yeah, well. It’s easy. Since I love you so much, I could put another shelf over there.” I gestured to the far wall. Then lifted a shoe and read off the bottom. “For the Valentinos and whatever else doesn’t fit on this one.”

  Her eyes warmed. “You said the magic words.”

  “I love you?”

  “Valentino.”

  I groaned. My girl liked her shoes. But they looked hot as fuck on her.

  So I guess I liked them too.

  “What’s new with Payton?”

  Charlotte lifted a shoulder, which had me noticing the coral dress she wore. New? Maybe. But it looked easy enough to take off, which was the most important factor.

  “…She does work for you,” I heard her say. “But I think it was a big relief to tell everyone about her pregnancy. And I know she appreciates you working with her to figure out how to get her a few months off and cover her clients.”

  “Yeah. It’s easier now that the program’s been rolled out company wide.” And now that corporate banking was safe and one of the top revenue generators in the business.

  “Oh, and did you see the thank you card Jimmy sent us from his wedding?”

  “Uh-huh.”

  Last month we’d visited her childhood home, where I’d met all the Merriweathers.

  At once.

  I’d earned serious points for that.

  I shifted off my knees to look for a screwdriver. We spent most of our time at my place, and maybe it’s egotistical but if I have my way she’ll be moving out of this place and in with me before she can make use of these damned shoe racks.

  But if I told her that, it’d start a fight.

  Which might end up in bed…

  And wouldn’t end for hours.

  I added it to my mental to-do list.

  “Come on, Avery, we have to go to this birthday party.”

  I glanced up to see Charlotte fastening some dangly earrings into her ears.

  “Let’s skip it.”

  “It’s your birthday,” she insisted. “Your uncle and Kenna are waiting for us.”

  I winced. It was true. Kenna’d sprung this on me, but apparently she and Charlotte had been planning it.

  Having my girlfriend take class with my sister was a bad fucking idea. I loved that my two favorite people got along, but I’d been thinking it would end with the summer class. Now that Kenna had decided to stay in school, she’d picked a communications elective this fall with Charlotte.

  Between the stuff my girlfriend was spouting from class and what she’d brought home from her work at the club? It made me feel like the slacker.

  Not that I minded. She was smart and sexy and I loved seeing how she lit up when she talked about it.

  By now everyone knew I was dating Charlotte. I’d thought it would be hard to tell them, but when I went to do it, it was easy.

  Maybe because I’d been in love with her for as long as I could remember.

  Or because I was starting to trust that she loved me just as much.

  Just looking at her had my heart expanding in my chest.

  “Two minutes,” I insisted. “I’m going to finish this if it kills me. Where are your tools?”

  “Tools?”

  I crossed to the bed and yanked open the nightstand drawer. “Whoa. This might be a dealbreaker.”

  Charlotte crowded in around me as I stared at the selection of sex toys. “What? Oh, come on. Don’t be intimidated. You’re way bigger than any of those.”

  “I’m not intimidated.”

  I might’ve been, had I seen these a year ago. But I’d been making this woman scream going on six months, thank you very much.

  A piece of paper lodged in the edge caught my attention. I yanked it out.

  Scratch that, two pieces.

  Any uncertainty that’d arisen from opening the drawer was gone in a second. In that moment, the grin on my face couldn’t have been stripped off with turpentine. “Are these part of the Charlotte Merriweather DIY experience?” I held up the first—a picture of me, presumably from her damned calendar.

  “Maybe.”

  “Then what’s this?” I unfolded the second sheet. It was an image of me at a corporate event nearly two years ago. Big, shiny, glossy…with July over my head.

  “Wait—Charlotte, did you do this more than one year?”

  “Guilty. You mad?”

  I considered. “I had no idea this was such an important part of your life.”

  “I might have gotten off to you a few times,” she admitted.

  I
rubbed my fingers over the paper. “I’m pretty sure this is still wet.”

  She shoved me, but I moved too fast, grabbing her by the hips.

  Her eyes darkened. Oh, yeah, this was my girl.

  I knew it before my hands skimmed up her thighs.

  Before her breathy little sigh.

  “I already got dressed,” she murmured. “This is what I’m wearing for your birthday.”

  My fingers found their way between her legs, where she was already damp through my favorite lace panties.

  “Then how about you take it off,” I suggested, my fingers rubbing against her slick skin. “For my birthday.”

  Charlotte moaned and like that my dick was pressing against the fly of my pants. What this woman did to me.

  “I think that could be arranged,” she sighed as I toppled her onto the bed.

  Here’s the thing I never understood before about being in a relationship. It’s not about the fights. It’s having someone for everything.

  And this woman was everything.

  Not just the scent of her skin that struck me dumb every time I stripped her naked.

  Or the way her tits fit in the palms of my hands, like they did now as I impatiently tugged off her lace bra.

  Not even the way her eyes changed colors when I pressed inside her.

  It was the fact that we’d started out by breaking the rules. But somewhere in the midst of it, we’d found our own way. Our own rules.

  Not the ones we thought we needed to play by, but the ones that worked for us.

  And if they didn’t work for us? We’d change them.

  Because Charlotte wasn’t just what I wanted.

  She was what I needed.

  I tried like hell to be what she’d needed. When we’d woken up in my bed this morning, we’d both needed slow. Long, leisurely strokes and lazy smiles as we loved each other through an entire Saturday morning.

  Tonight, if we were going to make out dinner reservation and avoid pissing off my sister? It was going to have to be fast.

  Charlotte was on the plan. From the way her beautiful face flushed, and the sounds she made low in her throat when I sucked a nipple into my mouth, I knew she was ready to pop.

  “OhmiGod Avery. Yeah, like that.” She sounded like a wicked angel, the low plea of her voice competing with the sounds of the bedsprings as I pressed into her with long strokes.